to nowhere land

I know who holds tomorrow - Ira Stanphill

I don't know about tomorrow,
I just live from day to day.
I don't borrow from it's sunshine,
For it's skies may turn to gray.
I don't worry o'er the future,
For I know what Jesus said,
And today I'll walk beside Him,
For He knows what is ahead.
Refrain
Many things about tomorrow,
I don't seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.

Ev'ry step is getting brighter,
As the golden stairs I climb;
Ev'ry burden's getting lighter;
Ev'ry cloud is silver lined.
There the sun is always shining,
There no tear will dim the eyes,
At the ending of the rainbow,
Where the mountains touch the sky.

Refrain
Many things about tomorrow,
I don't seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.

I don't know about tomorrow,
It may bring me poverty;
But the One Who feeds the sparrow,
Is the One Who stands by me.
And the path that be my portion,
May be through the flame or flood,
But His presence goes before me,
And I'm covered with His blood.

Refrain
Many things about tomorrow,
I don't seem to understand;
But I know Who holds tomorrow,
And I know Who holds my hand.

Unpredictable situation. A lot of things are messy. Sometimes i think i've taken too much on my plate. How could I finish 6 different dishes and not feel a sense of indigestion? Febuary comes, and goes. Probably the busiest month of all. I hope I come out stronger and better. The months ahead are tough. But hey, i only started living after 2006. 2007 was awsome, 2008 was a blast and 2009 is going to be even tougher and probably the toughest yet.  Maybe I'll look back one day and say, hey it wasn't that bad after all. 

I don't know what lies ahead, but I know God is with me. 

I don't really know what to say anymore. 

As I was looking through the net pages, I saw the St Hilda's website. Nostalgic. I spent 20minutes, looking at an organisational chart that had at least 50% of teachers I couldn't recognise, newsletters that were not printed out anymore, (i used to keep every issue of the hildan light!), a blog that documented all the cca achievements and a psg group page. How time flies. Its been 6 years since I last studied there. I'd be going back tomorrow to pick the little girl up from school. I want to go in and say hi to the teachers I miss and step onto memory lane of a school i fondly remember. But something holds me back, and I don't know how to describe it either. Maybe its just issues with myself, I don't know. I don't like to go back alone but who shares the same favourite teachers that I do and the favourite laksa, nasi lemak stall that i patronized. For all you know, it isn't even there anymore. I want so much to go back to teach there, but again, something holds me back. Someone asked me why, but I couldnt explain it either. Expectations that no one gets. sheesh. 

I love the school a lot, more than dhs. 

I don't discredit dhs for what it has made me. But I really liked my days in St hilda's. Maybe it was the culture, maybe it was the teachers, maybe it was my friends, maybe it was the innocence of it all. 

I saw the homecoming pictures of DHS, and I just didn't feel at home. I have greater anticipation of going to SHPS, this time, i'm really going home. 

Thank God I was once there.